the ward method

Author: kelly ann ward

  • How to quiet your inner hater.

    How to quiet your inner hater.

    (Because she’s loud, dramatic, and usually wrong)

    You know the one.
    The voice that pops up the second you start to feel good about yourself.

    “You really think you’re gonna pull that off?”
    “She’s way better at that than you are.”
    “Maybe just… stay small today.”

    That voice?
    That’s your inner hater. And we all have one.

    Some days she whispers, some days she yells. But either way, she’s exhausting, and most of the time, she’s not even telling the truth.

    So how do you quiet her down without pretending she doesn’t exist?

    Here’s what’s helped me:

    1. Catch her in the act.

    The first step is noticing when she shows up. It’s usually in moments of growth or vulnerability. A new opportunity, a first date, a creative idea you’re excited about.
    She’ll try to keep you “safe” by talking you out of anything that feels unfamiliar.

    But once you name her—”oh hey, it’s that self-doubt again”, you take away some of her power.

    Awareness = distance.

    2. Talk back… like a friend would.

    Would you let your best friend say that sh*t to herself? No.
    So when your inner critic spirals into “You’re not good enough,”
    try this instead:
    “Actually, I’m doing the best I can.”
    “This feels hard, but I’m still showing up.”
    “I don’t have to be perfect to be proud of myself.”

    You don’t need to lie to yourself. You just need to be kinder.

    3. Take the action anyway.

    Your inner hater thrives on inaction.
    If you stay stuck, she gets to stay in charge.

    But when you do the thing, launch the blog, go to the event, wear the outfit, say the thing, you collect evidence that she’s wrong.
    That you’re capable. Resilient. Worth listening to.

    And the more evidence you collect, the quieter she gets.

    Your inner critic isn’t bad, she’s just outdated.

    She’s running on old fears, old stories, old insecurities.
    But you? You’re growing. You’re evolving. And you get to rewrite the narrative.

    So the next time she tries to talk you out of your own potential, take a deep breath and remember:

    She’s loud, but you’re louder.

    You’ve got this.
    Even if your inner hater disagrees.

  • 4 Wellness myths we need to let go of.

    4 Wellness myths we need to let go of.

    Let’s be honest, wellness can feel like a full-time job these days.

    Between the endless green powders, sunrise yoga, and TikToks telling you that if you don’t meditate, journal, and drink lemon water before 6AM… you’re doing it wrong, it’s a lot.

    But here’s the thing: real wellness isn’t performative. It’s not curated. And it’s definitely not one-size-fits-all.

    So let’s bust a few myths that might be making you feel like you’re “not doing enough” when really, you’re doing just fine.

    1. You have to wake up at 5AM to be healthy

    Sure, early mornings work for some people, but if you’re not wired that way, that’s okay. Productivity doesn’t live exclusively in the AM. What matters more is creating a routine that feels supportive, not one that drains you before the day even starts. Sleep is sacred. Your timeline is your own.

    2. You need a perfect morning routine

    You don’t need a Pinterest-worthy ritual to “win the day.” A routine that works for you might look like drinking water before coffee, stepping outside for a breath of fresh air, or just giving yourself ten minutes of quiet before diving into work. The magic is in the intention, not the aesthetic.

    3. You need 15 supplements to feel good

    Supplements can be helpful, but they’re not a cure-all. Sometimes, what your body really needs is proper sleep, whole foods, hydration, and movement. Don’t get distracted by shiny wellness marketing. The basics are still the most powerful tools we have.

    4. Clean eating = clean living

    Let’s stop moralizing food. “Clean” eating often leads to obsessive patterns, guilt, and a disconnection from your body’s actual needs. Trust me. True wellness is flexible. It’s about nourishment and enjoyment. Your worth isn’t determined by your salad-to-cookie ratio.

    So what does real wellness look like?

    It looks like tuning into your body.
    Choosing rest when you’re tired.
    Moving your body because it feels good, not as punishment.
    Eating foods that energize you, not restrict you.
    And letting go of the pressure to fit into someone else’s version of “healthy.”

    Because the real flex?
    Taking care of yourself without the pressure to perform.

  • Finally choosing yourself?

    Finally choosing yourself?

    For the longest time, I was caught in this endless loop of trying to fit in, please others, and chase versions of myself that weren’t really mine. Maybe you’ve been there too, changing how you talk, dress, or even think just to make other people comfortable or to avoid rocking the boat.

    But somewhere along the way, I realized that choosing myself isn’t about selfishness. It’s about honouring the messy, complicated, beautifully imperfect person I actually am, and giving myself permission to live out loud in that truth.

    It’s not always glamorous or Instagram-worthy

    Choosing yourself doesn’t mean waking up one day and having everything figured out. It’s not a dramatic “mic drop” moment where you suddenly have all the answers or perfect confidence. For me, it was way more subtle, a slow peeling back of layers, little by little, until I stopped hiding who I was.

    It meant saying no to things that drained me, even when I felt guilty. It meant embracing my quirks and my weirdness without apology. It meant spending more time doing what lit me up, and less time trying to be what others expected.

    The freedom that comes from being unapologetically you

    When I started to lean into my own vibe, everything shifted. I noticed my energy felt lighter, my relationships deeper, and even my creativity blossomed. There’s a certain kind of power in knowing you don’t have to perform or pretend to be anyone else.

    Choosing yourself also means trusting that you’re enough exactly as you are. Not because you did something amazing or reached a milestone, but because you exist, and that’s enough.

    Why it’s worth the discomfort

    Here’s the real talk: choosing yourself can feel scary. You might lose people or face judgment. You might confront parts of yourself you’ve ignored or been afraid to face.

    But it’s also the only way to find true peace. When you stop bending to fit the world’s expectations, you start to create space for the people and experiences that actually belong in your life.

    So if you’re still figuring it out, that’s okay. Keep choosing yourself in small ways every day. Keep showing up as your messy, beautiful, authentic self.

    Because at the end of the day, you’re the one you have to live with, and learning to love that person? That’s everything.

  • My go-to green smoothie (um, yum)

    My go-to green smoothie (um, yum)

    Let’s be honest, sometimes I wake up feeling like my brain is wrapped in a foggy blanket. You know the feeling: scattered thoughts, low energy, and zero motivation before noon. Over the years, I’ve found that starting my day with a green smoothie loaded with berries is the best way to clear that mental clutter and get my brain firing on all cylinders.

    Here’s the thing: green smoothies aren’t just about getting your veggies in (though that’s a win too). When you throw in berries, you’re adding a serious brain boost packed with antioxidants, vitamins, and healthy fats that actually support how your brain works.

    Why berries are the MVPs for your brain:

    Berries like blueberries, strawberries, and raspberries are like little antioxidant warriors. They fight off oxidative stress, which sounds fancy but basically means they protect your brain cells from damage caused by daily stress, pollution, and just living life.

    Plus, they help improve communication between brain cells, so your memory and focus get a natural upgrade. Perfect for those mornings when you’ve got a million tabs open in your head.

    And don’t forget the greens:

    Spinach, kale, or whatever leafy green you’ve got on hand bring in folate and vitamin K, which have been linked to better brain function and mood stabilization. The combo of greens and berries gives you a cocktail of nutrients that work together to keep your mind sharp and your energy steady.

    Here’s what I love about my green smoothie ritual:

    • It’s quick and easy, five minutes in the blender and I’m set.
    • The sweet flavour from berries makes it feel like a treat, not a chore.
    • It feels like I’m doing something good for myself without the overwhelm of complicated health routines.
    • Bonus: it keeps me full and focused through those mid-morning slump hours.

    So next time your brain feels fuzzy or you’re spiraling, try blending up a green smoothie with a handful of berries. Your mind will thank you, and honestly? It’s a small act of self-care that feels pretty damn good.

  • Bye bye burnout.

    Bye bye burnout.

    Burnout isn’t always some big dramatic crash. Sometimes it’s just feeling done, your brain’s fuzzy, motivation’s MIA, and you’re scraping the bottom of your energy barrel but still expected to keep going.

    I wrote about this in my latest article for Odyssey Magazine’s 250th edition, a space I’ve loved for years because they get that wellness isn’t about perfection or hype. It’s messy, real, and often slow as hell.

    If you’re feeling stretched, stuck, or just tired-tired, these two simple habits helped me come back to myself when I thought there was nothing left to give.

    1. Set tiny boundaries that feel good

    This isn’t about shutting down your whole life. It’s the little things that add up, like ditching your phone 30 minutes before bed, saying no to one extra thing each week, or giving yourself permission to take a 10-minute breather every couple of hours.

    Boundaries aren’t mean or selfish. They’re the energy filters we all need to stay sane.

    2. Switch up your morning routine

    Routine can turn robotic fast. So I change one small thing every week, maybe I swap my usual coffee for tea, take a new route on my walk, or try a different playlist.

    It’s a simple way to remind yourself your day doesn’t have to feel like Groundhog Day. Small changes make a big difference.

    Burnout is a slow drip, but you’re not powerless. Tiny shifts like these helped me stop running on empty and start showing up for myself again.

    If you want to read the full article and get into more honest, no-BS wellness talk, check out Odyssey Magazine’s milestone issue, I’m so grateful to be part of it.

    So if you’re tired-tired, start here. Because your energy and your peace are the whole point.

  • June gloom got you spiraling?

    June gloom got you spiraling?

    You know that weird, foggy stretch of time where the sky’s grey for no reason, your motivation’s missing, and everything feels a little meh?

    Yep. June Gloom. It’s a thing. And if you’re anything like me, it messes with your vibe just enough to make you feel off, even when everything else seems fine.

    And while it’s not full-on seasonal depression, there’s definitely something about grey skies and that weird middle-of-the-year limbo that makes you question… everything?

    So if you’ve been feeling low-key tired, uninspired, or just kind of over it, here are 3 ways I’ve been dealing with the gloom, without pretending I’m suddenly a productivity machine:

    1. Romanticize your routine, even if it’s boring

    Yes, I said it. The only thing getting me through this grey weather is making my everyday routine feel like a low-budget indie film.
    Warm matcha in a real mug (not a to-go one).
    Reading a chapter of a book instead of doom scrolling.
    Putting on a playlist that sounds like main character energy in the rain.

    It doesn’t have to be aesthetic or perfect. Just intentional. A moody walk in a hoodie. Cooking something warm. Writing a list. Let the weather slow you down, in a good way.

    2. Stop forcing sunshine energy when you’re in a fog

    This one’s for my overachievers. You’re not lazy or broken if you don’t feel like doing it all right now. There’s nothing wrong with needing more rest, silence, or solitude when things feel heavy.

    Your body and brain are responding to lower light, lower serotonin, and the subtle stress of “mid-year pressure.”
    So instead of pushing, pause.

    → Take the pressure off.
    → Do what you can, then give yourself permission to chill.
    → Let yourself feel cozy, even if it’s June.

    3. Get outside, even if it’s just for 10 minutes

    Okay, hear me out, this sounds basic, but it actually helps.
    Even on cloudy days, natural light (especially morning light) can reset your circadian rhythm, boost your mood, and help you feel slightly more alive.

    Grab your hoodie, throw on headphones, and step out for a walk. Go to a yoga flow session. You don’t need to hit 10K steps or see the sun, just move. Let your eyes look far away. Let your brain defog a little. It’s underrated magic.

    June doesn’t always feel like summer mentally. Sometimes it’s grey skies, hot coffee, and being kind to yourself for showing up anyway.

    You’re not behind. You’re not failing. You’re just in a season. And it’s okay to meet it with softness instead of resistance.

    Now go pour yourself something warm, romanticize the fog, and maybe cry to a Slow Pulp song. You’re doing great.

  • Distraction is the enemy of vision.

    Distraction is the enemy of vision.

    We live in a world where everyone’s doing something.
    Launching something. Building something. Manifesting something.
    It’s constant motion, but what’s the intention behind it?

    Because here’s the thing no one really talks about:
    Distraction doesn’t always look like scrolling TikTok or binge-watching another comfort show.
    Sometimes, distraction looks like productivity. Like staying busy with everything but the thing that actually matters.

    We signal instead of do.
    We post about healing before we’ve even taken a breath.
    We say yes to everything because we’re scared of missing out, but end up missing ourselves in the process.

    The Age of Signaling

    In a hyper-online world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of signaling, showing people that you’re self-aware, evolving, healing, successful, whatever. And while there’s nothing wrong with sharing your growth, there’s a fine line between expression and performance.

    Are you actually becoming the person you want to be?
    Or are you just signaling that you’re on your way there?

    Because true vision, the kind that leads you to your purpose, isn’t loud. It doesn’t need applause.
    It’s quiet. Internal. Often messy and deeply personal.

    And it needs your full attention.

    Distraction Dilutes Clarity

    When you’re constantly consuming other people’s goals, routines, aesthetics, timelines, it’s easy to start questioning your own.
    You lose clarity. You lose time. You lose you.

    Distraction isn’t always the obvious stuff.
    It’s also:

    • Comparing your pace to someone else’s
    • Saying “yes” to things that feel like a “meh”
    • Getting caught up in aesthetics over alignment
    • Reaching for validation instead of connection

    And worst of all?
    Distraction keeps you almost fulfilled, busy enough to feel productive, but not grounded enough to feel purposeful.

    Vision requires boundaries

    If you have a vision for your life, a business, a book, a lifestyle, a version of you who feels more at peace, you need boundaries.
    With your time. With your energy. With your attention.

    That doesn’t mean being rigid or robotic.
    It means making space for the real work.
    It means tuning in instead of tapping out.
    It means choosing depth over noise.

    So how do you focus again?

    You don’t need a digital detox and a silent retreat (unless you want one).
    You just need to come back to yourself.
    One decision at a time.

    • Ask yourself: what am I doing right now, and is it aligned with where I want to go?
    • Stop signaling. Start building.
    • Let the vision be enough, even if no one claps yet.

    Because distraction may be loud, but clarity is louder, once you get quiet enough to hear it.

    You don’t need to look like you’ve got it together.
    You just need to stay connected to what actually matters.

    Let your vision lead.
    Not the noise.

  • The male gaze + sexual wellness.

    The male gaze + sexual wellness.

    Let’s just say it: female pleasure has been misunderstood, dismissed, and distorted for far too long. And the male gaze? She’s been running the show like an overworked director with a fragile ego and no clue how women actually work.

    In my latest podcast episode, I unpacked the connection between the male gaze and female orgasms, and no, not just in a “sex ed” kind of way. I’m talking about the emotional, psychological, and very real impact that cultural conditioning has had on how women experience (or struggle to experience) intimacy and pleasure.

    Spoiler: it’s not you.
    It’s the pressure to perform.
    To look good while feeling good.
    To prioritize someone else’s desire over your own.

    The male gaze is not your mirror

    If you’ve ever been in your head during sex, wondering what you look like instead of how you feel, you’re not alone. That’s the male gaze, embedded like background noise in so many women’s minds.

    It’s not about hating men. It’s about understanding how growing up in a world that tells you your value is how desirable you are can really mess with your sense of self. Even in your most intimate, personal moments.

    And that shame or detachment you might feel around your body? It’s not your fault. It’s conditioning. And the good news? It can be unlearned.

    Orgasms are not a performance

    We grow up learning that pleasure is a bonus, not the point. That it’s something you earn. That it’s supposed to look a certain way. Cue the performative moans, the faking, the fear of “taking too long.”

    But here’s the truth: you don’t exist for someone else’s viewing pleasure.

    Pleasure is a birthright. Self-love isn’t just bubble baths and affirmations, it’s being able to connect to your body, feel safe in it, explore what you like, and not feel guilty about wanting more.

    So what does sexual wellness really mean?

    It means understanding that your body isn’t an object.
    It’s a home.
    A place where you feel, not just look.

    It means learning what feels good, not because Cosmo said so, not because your ex liked it, but because you like it.

    It means removing shame, comparison, and “am I doing this right?” energy from your most sacred moments.

    And yes, it means talking about orgasms on a podcast. With your iced matcha. In your car. Because that’s real life.

    If this resonated, go give the episode a listen.
    It’s not about shock value, it’s about reclaiming something that was never supposed to be shameful in the first place.

    You deserve to take up space, in your pleasure, in your body, in your story.

  • Meet the girlies: 4 Archetypes you’ve definitely embodied (depending on the week)

    Meet the girlies: 4 Archetypes you’ve definitely embodied (depending on the week)

    We’re all a little soft and a little feral. One day we’re lemon water + journaling, the next we’re three coffees deep with 45 tabs open and a playlist called “burnout, but make it pretty.”

    Whether you’re in your cortisol-conscious era or chilling into your CEO energy, here are four girlie archetypes that live rent-free in our collective personalities:

    1. The cortisol-conscious queen

    She knows her stress levels like other people know their Starbucks order.
    She’s tracking her nervous system, sipping magnesium mocktails, and reminding everyone that peace isn’t a luxury, it’s a boundary.

    Her vibe:
    Prioritizes slow mornings + sun before screen
    Thinks “regulation” is hotter than hustle
    Carries a supplement pouch like it’s a designer bag

    Her outfit:
    Comfy matching set, fluffy socks, salt lamp glow. Hair slicked, soul grounded.

    She’s not dramatic. She’s just not available for dysregulation.

    2. The chill ‘I don’t care’ cool girl

    She’s unbothered (or at least trying to be).
    She’s somewhere between “romanticizing her life” and quietly spiraling, but always in style.

    Her vibe:
    Makes playlists for every mood
    Lives in oversized everything
    Disappears for 48 hours, comes back with new film photos + perspective

    Her outfit:
    Baggy jeans, vintage crewneck, sunglasses indoors, probably holding a matcha or black iced coffee like it’s an accessory.

    She’s not detached. She’s just in her observe, not absorb era.

    3. The soft power CEO

    She runs her life with a combo of strategy, softness, and really good penmanship.
    She’s the girl who gets things done, without burning herself out to prove a point.

    Her vibe:
    Colour codes her calendar and her thoughts
    Has a morning routine but leaves space to feel
    Takes intentional rest without guilt

    Her outfit:
    Structured blazer, slick bun, gold hoops, wide-leg trousers, tote bag full of highlighters, protein bars, and ambitious dreams.

    She doesn’t chase. She attracts. (But she’ll follow up with a Google Doc.)

    4. The biohacking babe

    She’s regulating her circadian rhythm and probably grounding in the garden barefoot.
    Her TikTok is 80% wellness hacks, and she has at least 3 wearables monitoring her “internal terrain.”

    Her vibe:
    Cold plunges for fun
    Adds adaptogens to her smoothies like it’s a spell
    Thinks sleep is the ultimate flex

    Her outfit:
    Seamless activewear, scrunchie on wrist, chlorophyll water on standby, aura that says “I drink water with intention.”

    She’s not trying to be better than you.
    She just literally bio hacked her stress response and wants to share.

    So… which one are you today?

    Maybe you’re soft CEO by day, chill cool girl by night.
    Maybe you’re slowly becoming your cortisol-conscious self while scrolling through infrared saunas on Pinterest.
    Maybe you’re just tired, but in a cute hoodie.

    Whatever season you’re in, she’s growing, glowing, and doing her best.

    And that’s more than enough.

  • 5 Affirmations that will actually shift your mood.

    5 Affirmations that will actually shift your mood.

    Let’s be real. Sometimes life just feels… heavy.
    Maybe you woke up on the wrong side of the bed, or the endless to-do list has you spiraling, or you’re just plain tired of carrying the weight of your own brain.
    We all have those days when our mood is less “I got this” and more “please send coffee and a hug.”

    That’s when I turn to affirmations, not the cheesy, crystal-gazing kind, but real, grounded little phrases I say to myself to get back on track.

    Here are 5 affirmations I use that actually shift my mood and help me breathe easier:

    1. “I am allowed to feel all of this.”

    Sometimes the best permission you can give yourself is to just feel.
    There’s no timeline on emotions, and telling yourself it’s okay to be upset, anxious, or even bored can take some of the pressure off.
    When I say this, it’s like telling my brain, “It’s okay. I see you. You don’t have to fix everything right now.”

    2. “This moment is temporary.”

    Nothing stays the same forever, even that weird cloud of stress or sadness you’re carrying.
    Reminding myself that whatever I’m feeling will pass helps me hold space without panicking or overthinking.
    It’s a small phrase that gives me big relief.

    3. “I don’t have to do it all today.”

    Perfectionism and burnout love to sneak in when your brain tells you you have to be perfect, always.
    This affirmation is a little rebellion against that.
    It lets me slow down, break things into chunks, and remember that progress > perfection.

    4. “I am enough just as I am.”

    Some days, the voice inside your head is your harshest critic.
    This one is a soft hug.
    A reminder that you don’t need to prove your worth or hustle harder to earn love or respect.
    You’re already enough, messy hair, overthinking brain, and all.

    5. “I choose to focus on what I can control.”

    There’s always going to be noise and chaos out there, but this affirmation grounds me.
    It’s about gently letting go of what’s outside my control and putting energy into what I can do, whether that’s a deep breath, a small task, or reaching out to a friend.
    It’s a reset button when everything feels overwhelming.

    I don’t chant them for hours or try to “manifest” a perfect day.
    Instead, I pick one that fits the moment, sometimes just whispering it under my breath when I’m in the shower, or writing it down in my notebook, or repeating it while making coffee.
    It’s the small, gentle reminders that add up over time.

    Give it a try.
    Next time you feel stuck or heavy, pick an affirmation.
    Say it out loud, write it down, or just sit with it.
    You might be surprised at how much a few words can shift your whole day.