the ward method

Category: Uncategorized

  • The trip that saved my mental health.

    The trip that saved my mental health.

    Howdy friends

    So… I recently took a trip that honestly changed everything. Not in a huge, dramatic, life-turning-upside-down kind of way. But in that slow, subtle, soul-shifting kind of way. The kind that reminds you what it actually feels like to be alive, not just functioning.

    I’ve been in hustle mode for a few years now. Wake up, create content, tick off the to-do list, try to keep the algorithm happy, try to keep myself together… and somewhere along the way, I forgot how to pause. I mean really pause. I forgot what it felt like to not be performing productivity 24/7. Like, when was the last time I did something just because I wanted to, not because it needed to be documented, edited, posted, or optimized?

    Let me tell you: a few days on a farm with no real plans, no pressure, and no phone signal will humble and heal you real quick.

    The trip was for my friend’s birthday, just a bunch of us, a car packed with snacks, and a long drive into the middle of nowhere. I had my headphones in, the mountains were rolling by, and for the first time in a while, I didn’t feel the need to check my phone. It was just me and my thoughts… which, if you’re like me and have an extra chatty brain, can feel like a lot at first. But after a while, something softened. I started to settle.

    We stayed in this big old farmhouse surrounded by open fields and animals and that crisp kind of mountain air that feels like therapy. We’d wake up early (like… sunrise early), explore the land, walk until our legs ached, and just be. No notifications. No chaos. Just conversations by the fire, good food, shared laughter, and the kind of silence that feels full instead of empty. The stars at night were unreal. Like movie-scene unreal. And I remember thinking, “This. This is what I want more of.”

    And that’s when it hit me, how much I’ve been craving presence. Like real, grounded, I’m-actually-here presence. Not “here, but thinking about five other things.” Not “here, but worried about who saw my story.” Just… here.

    When I stepped away from the routine, the social media, the constant noise, I finally had space to hear myself again. I could actually feel what I’d been too busy to notice: how tired I was. How overstimulated. How I’ve been using productivity as a distraction from my own feelings. How healing isn’t always about doing more, it’s about feeling safe enough to stop doing.

    Which brings me to this thing I’ve been learning about (and slightly obsessing over): nervous system regulation.

    Here’s the deal: your nervous system is basically your internal thermostat for safety. When you’re overwhelmed, anxious, or stuck in go-go-go mode, your sympathetic system (aka fight or flight) takes over. It’s like your body thinks you’re constantly under threat, even when you’re just answering emails. But when you’re grounded, calm, and feeling safe, your parasympathetic system (rest and digest mode) kicks in. That’s where real healing happens. That’s where you can actually feel good.

    On the farm, I was unknowingly regulating my nervous system every single day:
    ☁️ Waking with the sun
    🌲 Walking in nature
    🧘🏽‍♀️ Sitting in stillness without performing it
    🔥 Laughing by the fire
    ⭐️ Staring at the stars with no agenda

    And slowly, I realized: this is the kind of peace I want to build into my everyday life. Not just something I escape to once a year. But something I create in small ways every day. A little pocket of calm here. A moment of joy there. A breath, a pause, a decision to put the phone down and pick presence up instead.

    Here’s the truth: you don’t need to go off-grid or live on a farm to feel this. You just need to remember you’re allowed to stop performing. You’re allowed to rest. To feel. To be soft. To enjoy things that don’t look productive but feel peaceful.

    So now, I’m in this new season, still healing, still figuring things out, still craving slowness. I’m not trying to “fix” myself all the time. I’m just trying to feel more like myself. I want to spend time with people who calm my nervous system, not trigger it. I want to create, but not at the expense of my joy. And I want more memories that feel like that trip: unfiltered, unshared, mine.

    If you’ve been feeling stuck in survival mode or like you’ve forgotten how to just be, maybe this is your sign to step back. Take a day. Or even just an afternoon. Go outside. Sit in silence. Turn your phone off. Make something with your hands. Water your plants like it’s a ritual. Make a smoothie and drink it without scrolling. You don’t have to earn rest. You just have to remember that you deserve it.

    Thanks for reading. I hope this gave you that little breath of fresh air you’ve been needing. You’re not broken. You’re just tired. And I promise, stillness isn’t scary once you let it hold you.

    Until next time, breathe, rest, and romanticize the boring stuff. That’s where the magic really is. 🤍

  • Me vs. my brain (and how I’m learning to deal with OCD)

    Me vs. my brain (and how I’m learning to deal with OCD)

    Some days I feel like my brain has a mind of its own.

    One minute I’m brushing my teeth or walking down the street, and the next… BAM.
    An intrusive thought crashes in, loud, weird, terrifying, and completely out of nowhere.

    If you’ve ever dealt with OCD, especially the kind that involves obsessive thoughts, you’ll get it. The thought feels so real. So intense. And then comes the guilt spiral:
    “Why would I even think that?”
    “Does that mean something about me?”
    “What if I can’t make it stop?”

    It’s exhausting. And lonely. And sometimes it feels like I’m fighting my own mind with no way out.

    But here’s what I’m learning:

    1. Intrusive thoughts don’t define you.

    This was the hardest truth to accept. OCD is a liar. It throws the most disturbing, wild, irrational thoughts your way just to see if you’ll take the bait.
    You’re not broken for having these thoughts. You’re not bad. You’re just dealing with a brain that’s a little more sensitive to the “what ifs” of life.

    What’s helped me is labeling it in the moment. “This is just an intrusive thought. It’s my OCD. It’s not me.” That simple pause can stop the spiral from turning into a full-on storm.

    2. Resisting the urge to ‘solve’ it.

    OCD loves when you try to fix it. It feeds off reassurance, mental reviewing, googling, and checking.
    But the more I try to find certainty, the more trapped I feel.

    So now, I try to let the thought just… exist. I acknowledge it, cringe a little, and then gently refocus my attention. It’s uncomfortable, but temporary.

    My mantra? “I don’t need to figure this out right now.”

    3. I’m not “cured,” but I’m coping.

    OCD isn’t something I’ve conquered. It still shows up uninvited. But it doesn’t control me like it used to.
    I’ve learned to coexist with the chaos in my head, and I’m proud of that.

    Some days are hard. Some thoughts still scare me.
    But I’m learning to choose curiosity over panic.
    Compassion over shame.
    Progress over perfection.

    If you’re struggling with intrusive thoughts too, please know you’re not alone. You’re not weird. And you’re definitely not your OCD.

    You’re just a human with a beautifully complex brain, learning how to take your power back, one gentle breath at a time.

  • She’s not rushing: 3 habits for a slow, intentional morning.

    She’s not rushing: 3 habits for a slow, intentional morning.

    We’ve all been there, waking up and immediately checking our phone, mentally racing through our to-do list, and somehow ending up frazzled before we’ve even had coffee.
    But what if mornings didn’t have to start in survival mode?

    Here are three slow girl habits I swear by when I actually want to feel grounded (and not like I’m already behind on life):

    1. No phone for the first 30 minutes.

    Yes, I know it’s hard. But giving yourself even ten minutes without being bombarded by texts, TikToks, or existential email reminders gives your brain time to land. Instead, light a candle, open a window, stare out like a main character. Your thoughts will thank you.

    2. Romanticize something small.

    Whether it’s your oat milk matcha, a walk around the block, or your skincare routine with a vibey playlist, pick one thing and do it slowly, like you’re in a movie montage. Slow mornings aren’t about perfection, they’re about presence.

    3. Check in with yourself (before the world).

    This can be journaling, a voice note, a messy brain dump, or just asking, “How do I feel today?” Before you start being everything for everyone else, take a second to be there for you. Some days the answer is “meh.” That’s okay. The goal is honesty, not productivity.

    You don’t have to wake up at 5AM or become a wellness robot. Slow mornings are about intention, not performance. Even if it’s just 15 extra minutes of quiet, that counts.
    And sometimes, that’s all you need to shift the whole day.

  • 3 ways to live life that feels like you.

    3 ways to live life that feels like you.

    Life is messy, beautiful, confusing, and sometimes just plain exhausting. And honestly? There’s no one “right” way to do it. But after a lot of trial and error (and some awkward detours), I’ve found a few simple ways to live that actually feel like me, and maybe they’ll resonate with you, too.

    1. Show Up for Yourself, First.

    Before you can really show up for anyone else, you have to be in your own corner. That means honouring your needs, feelings, and boundaries, even when it’s uncomfortable. It’s saying “no” without guilt, carving out time to recharge, and choosing what lights you up instead of what drains you. When you prioritize your well-being, the rest falls into place more easily.

    2. Embrace the Uncertainty.

    Life rarely looks like the perfect plan. Sometimes, things get messy, and that’s okay. Instead of fighting the unknown or trying to control every detail, lean into the uncertainty. Be curious about what might happen next. Growth happens in the in-between spaces, not just the clear-cut milestones. So take a deep breath, trust your gut, and remember: it’s okay not to have all the answers.

    3. Create Your Own Definition of Success.

    Forget society’s checklist of success, the perfect job, the “right” relationship, the dream house. Your version of success might be slower, softer, and way more aligned with your values. Maybe it’s about meaningful connections, creative projects, or just waking up feeling calm and grateful. When you define success on your own terms, you stop chasing and start being.

    Living life your way isn’t about having it all figured out. It’s about choosing what matters to you, even when it feels scary or unconventional. It’s about being kind to yourself through the highs and lows and trusting that you’re exactly where you need to be.

    Here’s to living a life that feels less like a checklist, and more like you.

  • Female friendships in adulthood.

    Female friendships in adulthood.

    Adulting is hard. Between careers, relationships, self-care routines, and everything else, keeping friendships alive can sometimes feel like a full-time job, and honestly, it kind of is. But healthy female friendships? They’re everything. They’re the tribe that holds you up, makes you laugh when you want to cry, and reminds you that you’re never really alone.

    Here’s the truth: maintaining friendships as adults isn’t about constant texts or weekly hangouts. It’s about quality over quantity, real connection over surface-level “likes,” and showing up in ways that matter.

    Here’s how I keep my friendships healthy, honest, and meaningful, even when life gets chaotic:

    1. Make Intentional Time (Even if It’s Small)

    Life gets busy, and “catching up” can sometimes mean a quick text or a 20-minute phone call. That’s okay. The key is being intentional. Schedule those little moments, even if it’s just grabbing coffee or sending a thoughtful message, to remind your friends they matter. Quality beats quantity every time.

    2. Be Real, Always

    Adult friendships thrive on authenticity. That means showing up with your messy, imperfect self. Share your wins, your struggles, your bad days, and your good ones. Vulnerability deepens connections and builds trust, even if it feels uncomfortable at first.

    3. Respect Boundaries

    Everyone’s energy ebbs and flows. Sometimes your friend needs space, and that’s okay. Respecting boundaries, whether it’s around time, topics, or emotional capacity, keeps friendships sustainable and loving, rather than draining.

    4. Celebrate Each Other’s Growth

    Adult friendships evolve as we do. Instead of comparing where you each “should” be, celebrate the different paths and milestones. Whether it’s a new job, a tough decision, or a mental health breakthrough, being your friend’s biggest cheerleader is a superpower.

    5. Let Go of Guilt

    Maybe you missed a call, canceled plans, or haven’t spoken in a while. It happens. Let go of the guilt. True friendships survive silence, and sometimes life just takes over. What matters is the intention to reconnect and keep showing up when you can.

    6. Have Fun, No Pressure

    Friendships don’t always have to be deep conversations or emotional support. Sometimes, the best moments come from doing nothing serious, laughing over bad movies, crazy exes, dancing in the kitchen, or sending memes that make no sense.

    Friendships in adulthood aren’t perfect, but they’re worth the effort. They remind us who we are beyond the hustle, anchor us when things feel heavy, and bring joy when we least expect it.

    If you’re feeling disconnected, don’t overthink it, just reach out, be honest, and remember that real friendships aren’t about always being present, but about being present enough for each other.

    Because at the end of the day, it’s those bonds that keep us sane, inspired, and whole.

  • Q3 energy = soft goals + steady growth.

    Q3 energy = soft goals + steady growth.

    Somewhere along the way, we decided that planning your life had to feel like a part-time job.
    Colour-coded calendars. 5am alarms. Daily “power hour” blocks and quarterly vision boards.

    Cute in theory. Exhausting in reality.

    So here’s a radical idea:
    What if Q3 didn’t need to be your grind era?
    What if it could be your soft launch season, the one where you slow down, tune in, and grow at your own pace?

    That’s where I’m at.

    I’m calling it my “slow mornings, soft goals, steady growth” era. And no, it’s not a fancy routine with 17 steps. It’s more like a gentle rhythm I can return to when life feels a little loud.

    Here’s what it actually looks like:

    Slow mornings.

    Not “no mornings.” Just… slower ones.
    Ones where I actually pause before reaching for my phone. Where I write something down, make coffee, open a window. Where I let the day greet me instead of chasing it.

    You don’t need a 6-step skincare routine and a sunrise yoga flow (unless you love that). Sometimes, it’s enough to just sit with yourself for a few minutes and breathe.

    Soft goals.

    Not lazy goals. Not vague goals. Just goals that don’t make you want to cry.

    I’ve stopped trying to do all the things at once. Now, I pick 2–3 focus areas for the quarter, things that genuinely matter to me. Things I want to grow, not force.

    It’s less “reinvent your life in 30 days” and more “what can I pour into, slowly and meaningfully?”

    Steady growth.

    This is the part no one talks about.
    The quiet wins. The baby steps. The kind of progress that doesn’t show up on Instagram but feels huge in your own life.

    For me, that means checking in once a week.
    Not to critique, but to reflect:

    • What actually worked this week?
    • What felt off?
    • Did I move in the direction of the life I want?

    I do this with a notebook. Or sometimes in the notes app. Or on a walk. No rules, just realignment.

    We’re so used to pushing for more that we forget how powerful it is to move with intention instead of urgency.

    So if your brain’s been loud lately, if the world feels like a group project you didn’t sign up for, this is your sign to slow down. Pick a few things that matter. Create a rhythm that supports your peace, not just your productivity.

    Because Q3 doesn’t have to be a sprint.
    It can be the season where you finally stop rushing and start savouring.

  • My new mid-morning obsession.

    My new mid-morning obsession.

    I’ve entered my papaya era, and honestly? I’m not looking back.

    I used to be a “grab-whatever’s-nearby” kind of girl when it came to snacks. Half a protein bar, a spoonful of peanut butter, or something random and crunchy just to get through the slump between breakfast and lunch. But recently, I decided to romanticize the mid-morning lull. Enter: papaya.

    Yes, papaya.

    I know, she’s often overshadowed by her trendier cousins, avocado, mango, maybe even pineapple if we’re getting wild. But papaya? She’s the quiet one in the corner with soft skin, golden insides, and main character energy once you give her a chance.

    Here’s why I’m obsessed:

    1. She’s sweet without being chaotic.
    Papaya has this mellow, buttery sweetness that doesn’t overwhelm your taste buds or spike your sugar like a cupcake in disguise. It’s light. It’s gentle. It feels like someone whispering “you’re doing amazing, sweetie” directly into your nervous system.

    2. She supports the gut, and the glow-up.
    Papaya is packed with enzymes (hello, papain) that help with digestion, which means your tummy loves her. And if you’ve ever googled “foods for clear skin,” you’ve probably seen her on every list. Coincidence? I think not.

    3. She’s kind of aesthetic.
    Slice her open, scoop out the seeds, maybe add a lil’ lime juice or a dollop of coconut yogurt or blueberries? Suddenly you’re a wellness influencer in Bali. Or at least vibing like one between meetings.

    4. It’s giving intentional living.
    Something about choosing papaya as a snack feels… elevated. Like you’re not just grabbing food, you’re choosing nourishment. You’re taking a moment. You’re being the version of yourself who hydrates and journals and listens to SZA in the bath.

    Honestly, it’s less about the papaya and more about the energy of choosing it.

    So if you’ve been living off desk snacks or haven’t met your fruit quota this week, this is your sign. Go get yourself a papaya. Scoop her out slowly. Romanticize your Wednesday morning like it’s the start of something.

    Because it kind of is.

  • Are you a Ward or a mouse?

    Are you a Ward or a mouse?

    It’s a line I’ve heard my whole life.

    “Are you a Ward or a mouse?”

    My dad would say it half-jokingly, usually when I was having a meltdown, too scared to take the shot, or spiraling in self-doubt. It wasn’t said to dismiss my feelings, but to remind me of who I am. Of what I’m made of. And more importantly, who I’m capable of becoming.

    At the time, I would just laugh. I mean, hello, let me cry in peace. But now, as an adult, I carry those words like armour.

    Because life is going to knock you down. More than once. There will be days where you question your worth, your path, your abilities, days where everything feels like too much. And in those moments, that little voice echoes in my mind:

    “Are you a Ward or a mouse?”

    Not just a name, not just a catchphrase, but a reminder. That I’m not here to shrink. That I’ve survived things I thought would break me. That fear might visit, but it doesn’t get to drive.

    And maybe you didn’t grow up with that exact phrase, but I bet you’ve got something like it buried deep inside you. A voice that tells you: you’re stronger than you think.

    So how do you tap into that when everything feels heavy?

    Here’s what helps me:

    1. Say it out loud.
    Seriously. Say the phrase, or your version of it. Words have power. Speaking it reminds your body who you are. (Even if you’re crying while doing it. Especially then.)

    2. Do one brave thing.
    Send the email. Go to the gym. Post the thing. Apply for the job. Start the business. Take the step, even if your hands are shaking. Courage isn’t loud, it’s often the quiet decision to keep going.

    3. Make a ‘proof list’.
    Write down three things you’ve overcome. Three moments you were scared, but did it anyway. Let your past remind you that you’ve got receipts for your resilience.

    4. Move.
    Walk. Dance. Stretch. Move the energy around. Sometimes the shift happens not in your mind, but in your body.

    5. Let someone hype you up.
    Text your friend. Call your dad. Watch that YouTube video or listen to the podcast that always lifts you. Borrow someone else’s belief in you until you can feel your own again.

    Being brave isn’t about being fearless, it’s about feeling the fear and showing up anyway.

    You don’t have to roar to prove you’re strong. You just have to choose not to hide.

    So next time life tries to knock you back into your shell, ask yourself the question that’s been passed down in my family for years:

    Are you a [insert your last name]… or a mouse?

    And then remind yourself:
    You were never meant to be small.

  • When you’re tired of feeling everything all the time.

    When you’re tired of feeling everything all the time.

    Some days, I genuinely don’t know how I got out of bed.
    It’s not laziness. It’s not a lack of gratitude.
    It’s the heaviness that sits in your bones when your mind is in overdrive and your heart feels way too full.

    I’ve always been someone who feels deeply. The kind of person who reads between the lines even when no one asked me to. Who notices the shift in someone’s tone, the way their eyes flicker when they say “I’m fine.” Who can feel the energy in a room shift before anyone else does. And while that sensitivity can be a gift, it can also be so exhausting.

    Some days I love my own company. I romanticize my solo walks, matcha mornings, creative work sessions, and quiet evenings. But other days? The silence feels deafening. I look around and realize I don’t have people to share life with the way I want to. And the independence I’m usually so proud of suddenly feels like a wall I didn’t mean to build.

    It’s a strange place to be, craving connection but feeling misunderstood. Wanting to open up but feeling like no one would really get it.
    So you keep it all in. You carry it quietly.
    You smile, you work, you post.
    And underneath it all, you’re screaming into the void, just hoping someone might feel it too.

    I don’t have a magic answer for this.
    But I do know that feeling a lot doesn’t make you weak. It means you’re awake. Alive.
    It means you’re still in tune with the parts of yourself that this world hasn’t numbed.

    You don’t have to “fix” yourself for feeling too much. You don’t have to shrink or harden or pretend things don’t get to you. What you need is grace. Space to feel what you’re feeling without trying to justify it or wrap it in a bow.

    And if you’re in a season right now where everything feels a little heavy, where your bed feels safer than the world, and your thoughts feel louder than your voice, just know this:
    You’re not alone. You’re not dramatic. You’re not broken.
    You’re just feeling your way through it.

    And that’s more than enough for today.

  • the in-between – a poem by me.

    the in-between – a poem by me.

    i’m somewhere between
    growing up and letting go,
    between soft mornings and wild ideas,
    between knowing who i am
    and wanting to be someone new.

    this part of life feels like
    a half-packed suitcase,
    a late-night playlist,
    a sky that can’t decide
    if it’s sunrise or storm.

    i want to swim in the sea
    with salt in my hair and no signal,
    take roadtrips to nowhere
    with the windows down,
    count the stars like they’re answers
    to questions i haven’t asked yet.

    i want love that feels like
    a shared hoodie and eye contact,
    that safe kind of chaos
    that makes you feel more like you.

    i want to be free
    not just from things,
    but into something.
    into joy. into wonder.
    into the wide, weird middle
    where real life begins.

    so if you’re here too
    in the between, in the becoming
    just know:
    you’re not lost.
    you’re just on your way.