the ward method

Tag: anxiety

  • Me vs. my brain (and how I’m learning to deal with OCD)

    Me vs. my brain (and how I’m learning to deal with OCD)

    Some days I feel like my brain has a mind of its own.

    One minute I’m brushing my teeth or walking down the street, and the next… BAM.
    An intrusive thought crashes in, loud, weird, terrifying, and completely out of nowhere.

    If you’ve ever dealt with OCD, especially the kind that involves obsessive thoughts, you’ll get it. The thought feels so real. So intense. And then comes the guilt spiral:
    “Why would I even think that?”
    “Does that mean something about me?”
    “What if I can’t make it stop?”

    It’s exhausting. And lonely. And sometimes it feels like I’m fighting my own mind with no way out.

    But here’s what I’m learning:

    1. Intrusive thoughts don’t define you.

    This was the hardest truth to accept. OCD is a liar. It throws the most disturbing, wild, irrational thoughts your way just to see if you’ll take the bait.
    You’re not broken for having these thoughts. You’re not bad. You’re just dealing with a brain that’s a little more sensitive to the “what ifs” of life.

    What’s helped me is labeling it in the moment. “This is just an intrusive thought. It’s my OCD. It’s not me.” That simple pause can stop the spiral from turning into a full-on storm.

    2. Resisting the urge to ‘solve’ it.

    OCD loves when you try to fix it. It feeds off reassurance, mental reviewing, googling, and checking.
    But the more I try to find certainty, the more trapped I feel.

    So now, I try to let the thought just… exist. I acknowledge it, cringe a little, and then gently refocus my attention. It’s uncomfortable, but temporary.

    My mantra? “I don’t need to figure this out right now.”

    3. I’m not “cured,” but I’m coping.

    OCD isn’t something I’ve conquered. It still shows up uninvited. But it doesn’t control me like it used to.
    I’ve learned to coexist with the chaos in my head, and I’m proud of that.

    Some days are hard. Some thoughts still scare me.
    But I’m learning to choose curiosity over panic.
    Compassion over shame.
    Progress over perfection.

    If you’re struggling with intrusive thoughts too, please know you’re not alone. You’re not weird. And you’re definitely not your OCD.

    You’re just a human with a beautifully complex brain, learning how to take your power back, one gentle breath at a time.