the ward method

Tag: mental-health

  • Everything I want wants me more.

    Everything I want wants me more.

    I used to worry way too much about how I came across online. Like, crippling self-awareness every time I posted something quirky or hit “publish” on a YouTube video that felt too unfiltered. I’d overthink the captions. I’d cringe at the sound of my own voice. I’d spiral thinking, what if someone from work sees this and laughs?

    But then I turned 30.

    And I don’t know what exactly shifted, but I stopped caring in a way that felt… freeing.

    Now? I post the weird little video. I write the blog. I say what I actually mean. I romanticize the chaos. I give things a go even if I know people might not get it. Because here’s the thing, every time I show up as the most me version of myself, life mirrors that energy back. Opportunities come. The right people show up. Confidence builds.

    I started to believe in this idea that the things I want, the career, the friendships, the love, the freedom, the creative expression, they actually want me more. And when you really think about it, that mindset changes everything.

    It turns your self-doubt into self-trust.

    It turns the “what if they judge me” into “what if this opens doors I can’t even imagine yet?”

    Because the truth is, the people who are doing cool things in life aren’t the ones who waited until they felt 100% ready or polished or perfect, they’re the ones who went for it even when it felt cringe.

    So I’m no longer subscribing to the idea that I need to shrink myself to be liked or palatable.

    I’m here to be real. To be bold. To post the vlog. To follow the vision I’ve had in my head since forever. And honestly? It feels so good.

    Let this be your reminder that you don’t need permission to want more.
    And you definitely don’t need to water yourself down to be worthy of it.

    So go after it, even if it’s messy, even if it’s loud, even if it’s different.

    Because what you want… is already on its way to meet you.
    And it’s probably cheering you on, waiting for you to stop caring what other people think.

  • 4 ways to actually enjoy your weekend.

    4 ways to actually enjoy your weekend.

    Let’s be real: Some weeks feel like they’ve lasted 84 years. You’ve been in meetings, running errands, answering texts you didn’t have the energy for, and just doing the most. And by Friday? You’re a shell of a person who just wants snacks and silence.

    So, here’s your little reminder that the weekend isn’t just a time to catch up on laundry or stress about Monday, it’s also your time to feel like a human again.
    Here are 4 ways to help you do just that:

    1. Romanticize the hell out of your morning.

    Slow mornings are the ultimate act of rebellion in a world that loves urgency.
    Sleep in a bit. Light a scented candle. Put on some Addison Rae. Make your favorite breakfast. Drink your coffee slowly, like you’re in a film set in Italy.
    Put on a playlist that makes you feel like the main character and pretend you don’t have a single worry in the world, just for an hour or two.

    2. Do something fun with zero productivity attached.

    You don’t need to “earn” rest or joy. Pick something that makes you happy and do it just because.
    A cute farmer’s market stroll. A spontaneous drive. An art class. A Pilates session you barely get through but feel cute doing anyway.
    The goal is to do something that feels like you, not just something that looks good on your calendar.

    3. Disconnect to reconnect.

    Yes, I’m talking about a little break from your phone (even if it’s just for a few hours).
    Put it on Do Not Disturb. Go outside. Be with the people you love, or be alone with your thoughts (they’re not always as scary as we think).
    Go touch some grass, take a walk, breathe in the air like it’s your first time on Earth. Nature really is free therapy.

    4. Check in with yourself, gently.

    Use part of your weekend to ask yourself how you’re really doing.
    Not in a pressure-filled, “let’s fix everything” way, just a little mental check-in. Journaling, reading, reflecting, maybe even planning your week softly if that helps calm your brain.
    Give yourself space to feel whatever you need to feel, and remind yourself that you’re doing your best. Because you are.

    You don’t need a 3-day vacation to reset.
    Sometimes, all it takes is a weekend filled with intention, the kind where you take your power back, even in small ways.
    So go ahead: do less, laugh more, and don’t check your emails unless the building’s on fire.

    You deserve peace. And a pastry. Preferably both.

  • Maybe slowing down isn’t what I actually want.

    Maybe slowing down isn’t what I actually want.

    An honest take on productivity, purpose, and why staying busy might just be your kind of peace.

    I used to think the goal was a quiet life.
    Slow mornings. Simple pleasures. Peaceful days that stretch out like soft sunlight on the floor.
    And honestly? That still sounds beautiful.

    There’s something deeply romantic about living gently, taking time to appreciate the little things, drinking your coffee slowly, reading books in the afternoon, and going on long walks with no rush to be anywhere. And I think it’s important to have those moments. To know how to rest. To let yourself rest.

    But I’ve also come to a conclusion lately, which is, of course, subject to change because I’m human, but I don’t think that kind of slowness is what I truly want all the time.

    Because I know myself. And the truth is… I like being busy.
    I need to be building something. Doing something. Pouring myself into work or a project or an idea I care about.
    Being productive doesn’t drain me, it energizes me. It clears my mind. It gives me purpose.

    When I’m working on something I love, or even just having a full, busy day, I feel good.
    I feel like me.
    I’m not stuck overthinking or getting caught in a spiral about the past or what could’ve been.
    I’m moving forward. I’m in motion. And there’s something healing about that.

    I think we sometimes forget that being “busy” doesn’t have to be a bad thing.
    Sure, if you’re running on 5 cups of coffee 24/7 and never giving yourself a break, that’s a different story. But when you’re doing things that light you up? That challenge you? That make you feel capable and fulfilled? That’s not burnout, that’s fuel.

    Work, in the right context, keeps you young.
    It gives you something to wake up for. Something to grow towards.

    And of course, there are days when everything feels like too much. When the world is loud and heavy and you just want to rot on the couch with your comfort show and a snack, and that’s more than okay. We need those days too.
    But I don’t think I’m meant to live my life in slow motion. I think I’m meant to build.
    To do.
    To create.

    And maybe that’s your kind of peace too.

    So if you’ve been feeling guilty for loving the hustle, or if the idea of a “soft life” doesn’t totally resonate with you, you’re not broken.
    You’re probably just someone who finds calm in the chaos, clarity in the momentum.

    Keep showing up. Keep creating. Keep working on what makes you happy.
    Because that’s a life worth living, too.

  • I love Sunday’s omg.

    I love Sunday’s omg.

    I’ve always loved Sundays.

    Maybe it started when I was a kid, those sweet, simple Sundays with my family, getting ice-cream and going for long drives with the windows down and no real destination. It was the kind of day where nothing was rushed and everything just felt good. It’s funny how those small rituals become the ones you carry with you forever.

    Now that I’m older, Sundays still feel sacred. But they look a little different.

    They start with a yoga class in the morning, nothing crazy. Maybe I’ll grab a matcha or a smoothie afterwards, something that feels nourishing. And then, I head home, hop on the couch with a book, and just be for a while. No pressure. No notifications. Just sunshine pouring through the windows and a quiet blue sky above.

    It’s the kind of peace you can’t fake.

    Sometimes, I’ll throw on a face mask, scroll through Netflix until I land on some chaotic reality TV (you know the type), and let myself fully vibe out. Not because I’m avoiding the world, but because I need to check in with myself before stepping back into it.

    And that’s the thing. Alone time isn’t loneliness. It’s an act of care. A gentle pause. A reset.

    In a world that glorifies productivity, choosing to slow down, choosing yourself, is powerful. It’s not selfish. It’s essential.

    Because when we give ourselves space to rest, to breathe, to just exist without the pressure to perform…we come back stronger. Softer. More grounded. More ourselves.

    So if you’ve been craving some quiet, take it. Romanticize it. Protect it. Whether it’s a Sunday or a random Wednesday night, carve out time to just be with you.

    Trust me, you’re good company.

  • There was nowhere to go but everywhere.

    There was nowhere to go but everywhere.

    An ode to staying soft and brave, even when the road is uncertain.

    “There was nowhere to go but everywhere, so just keep rolling under the stars.” — Jack Kerouac

    I come back to this quote often. Not just because Kerouac is one of my favourite writers, but because these words feel like a gentle reminder from the universe: you’re not stuck, you’re just in motion.

    Life isn’t linear. It doesn’t always make sense. And sometimes, it takes breaking down on the side of your own metaphorical highway to remember that you’re still allowed to dream. Still allowed to get back in the car, blast your favourite song, and take the long way home.

    There’s something comforting about the idea that you don’t need a perfect plan to keep going. That you can be messy and unsure and still brave. That rolling under the stars, wherever they lead you, is enough.

    I think sometimes we convince ourselves we’ve missed our shot. That if we didn’t figure it all out by a certain age, or if things didn’t go as planned, then maybe we’re not cut out for the life we once wanted. But the truth is, we’re never too late for anything meant for us. Not love. Not growth. Not big, soul-filling dreams.

    And you don’t need to have it all figured out to start. You just need a little courage and a lot of heart. The rest? It comes as you go.

    No matter how old you are.
    No matter how defeated you’ve felt.
    You are strong enough to do hard things.
    To change direction.
    To start again.
    To roll on, dusty, hopeful, a little broken, but still here.

    So if you needed a sign today, this is it.

    You don’t need a map.
    You just need movement.
    Keep rolling.
    Keep showing up.
    There’s still everywhere left to go. Chase your dreams.

  • Don’t settle for a life you don’t want.

    Don’t settle for a life you don’t want.

    Let me be real for a second: I’ve compared myself to everyone.

    The friend who’s married.
    The influencer (I don’t even know) who just bought their dream house.
    The girl who travels full-time and somehow always looks like she belongs in a Pinterest board.
    Yes. I’ve scrolled. I’ve spiraled. I’ve questioned my path more times than I’d like to admit.

    But comparison? It’s not a vibe.

    And honestly, it’s exhausting trying to measure your life by someone else’s timeline.
    Been there. Not going back.

    I’ve realized I don’t want a life that just looks good. I want a life that feels good.
    One that’s mine. Not someone else’s recycled version of “success.”

    I don’t want to settle for a job that doesn’t fulfill me.
    I don’t want to force relationships that don’t feel right.
    I don’t want to shrink myself to make other people comfortable.

    And I definitely don’t want to chase milestones that don’t even align with what I want, just because everyone else seems to be doing them.

    Here’s the thing: no one else is living your life.

    They don’t wake up in your body. They don’t feel your passions. They don’t pay your bills. They don’t hear your dreams whispering to you when it’s quiet at night.

    So stop living for the audience.

    Start tuning into yourself. Your heart. Your truth.

    I’ve been guilty of losing focus. Of settling. Of trying to fit into versions of myself I outgrew a long time ago. But every experience, even the messy ones, made me stronger. Every time I questioned my path, I ended up creating a better one. One that actually feels like me.

    So if you’re in a season where things feel unclear, where you feel behind, where the comparison trap is louder than your own intuition, I get it. But here’s your sign to stop looking around and start looking in.

    You’re not too late. You’re not too much. You’re not falling behind.

    You’re just waking up to your own potential.

    And you deserve a life that lights you up, not one that chases validation from other people. Stop focusing on everyone else, and focus on you. Period.

  • Learning to love the in-between.

    Learning to love the in-between.

    There’s this weird space you land in after a long-term relationship ends.

    You’re not who you used to be.
    You’re not quite who you’re becoming.
    And honestly? It’s awkward. Uncomfortable. Quiet in a way that sometimes feels deafening.

    After a breakup, especially one that took up years of your life, it’s easy to feel like you’ve lost your person and your place. Your routines change. Your weekends feel empty. Your phone is quieter. Your bed feels too big.

    But I’m learning that this space, the space between where I’ve been and where I’m going, matters.

    It’s where the healing lives.
    It’s where the growth begins.
    It’s where you meet yourself again.

    There are days it feels lonely, yes. But being alone doesn’t mean you’re failing. It doesn’t mean you’re unwanted. It means you’re finally choosing yourself, maybe for the first time in a long time.

    And that’s brave as hell.

    I’ve had to remind myself that I don’t need to rush into something new just to avoid the discomfort.
    I don’t need to fill every silence.
    I don’t need to be “over it” in 30 days or less.

    Some mornings I wake up and feel peace for the first time in months. Other days, I want to text them just to feel a little less distant from what I lost. Both realities are valid. Healing isn’t linear.

    What’s helping me now is learning to enjoy the in-between.

    Taking myself out for coffee.
    Going to the beach with no one to impress.
    Laying in bed with my digital camera beside me, my favorite playlist on, and no plans.
    Making space for the quiet, even if it feels awkward.
    Letting this season soften me instead of harden me.

    Because one day, this version of me, the one that’s growing in solitude, figuring it out alone, will be the version I thank.

    So if you’re in the in-between too, take a breath. You’re not behind.
    You’re not broken.
    You’re just rebuilding.

    And maybe this chapter, as uncomfortable as it is, will be the one that finally brings you home to yourself.

  • I’m over living for the internet.

    I’m over living for the internet.

    I’m tired.
    Tired of trying to live up to every expectation I see online.
    Tired of measuring my worth based on how “put together” I look.
    Tired of chasing a version of perfection that doesn’t even feel real.

    At some point, I had to stop and ask myself:
    Who am I trying to impress? And at what cost?

    Because constantly trying to be the most flawless version of myself—physically, emotionally, aesthetically, is exhausting.
    And no matter how much effort I put in, it never actually feels like enough or like me.

    I’ve realized that this need to be “perfect and appealing” to the male gaze all the time. It’s not really worth it. Why would you want to look like everyone else?


    It’s been subconsciously forced to us through filtered highlight reels, impossible beauty trends, and the subtle (or not-so-subtle) messaging that we are:
    Not polished enough.
    Not thin enough.
    Not cool enough.
    Not enough.

    But what if we just let that go?

    What if instead of chasing perfection, we started chasing peace?
    Confidence that comes from within.
    The kind that isn’t dependent on validation, likes, or approval.

    I want to wake up and not immediately feel like I’m behind.
    I want to feel good in my own life, not just in curated, post-able moments.
    And most of all, I want to stop waiting to be some perfect version of myself before I start living fully.

    You can still take care of yourself.
    You can still want to grow and glow and become your best self.
    But you don’t have to hate yourself along the way.
    And you don’t have to become someone you’re not just to feel worthy.

    So no, I’m not chasing “perfect” anymore.
    I’m choosing to be real.
    Messy.
    Honest.
    And enough as I am.

    Because once you stop performing for the world and start showing up for yourself, everything changes.

  • Business is the ultimate sport (and women are winning)

    Business is the ultimate sport (and women are winning)

    In 2019, I launched my first brand—WardFit. A sustainable clothing line made locally in Cape Town, with a mission to create comfy, feel-good pieces for everyday people. I was 24, wildly optimistic, and probably a little too generous with freebies (rookie mistake). But that little brand? It taught me everything.

    Business is the ultimate sport. It’s strategy, grit, vision, resilience. You learn how to take rejection on the chin and keep showing up anyway. You learn that branding isn’t just about pretty colors or fonts, it’s storytelling, connection, psychology. You realize that clarity > complexity every single time. You figure out that energy matters, people buy into people. And you learn the hard way that not everyone deserves a discount.

    I’ve always been drawn to business, probably because I grew up watching my dad build his own and work hard everyday. Seeing him work for himself, take risks, and create something from the ground up planted that seed in me early. It showed me that being your own boss isn’t just a title, it’s a lifestyle. One that requires hard work, a strong mindset, vision, belief in yourself and the kind of persistence that doesn’t quit when things get hard.

    Starting WardFit sparked something in me. I didn’t go to business school. I didn’t have a huge budget or a big team. But I had passion, and that was enough to start. That was enough to figure it out as I went. And it showed me that if you care about something, if you have a vision, you can build something real from the ground up.

    And now? Women are everywhere in the business and branding space. We’re launching our own companies, redefining leadership, telling our stories out loud, and doing it in a way that feels authentic. It’s not about playing the game the way it’s always been played, it’s about rewriting the rules.

    We’re not just making noise, we’re building empires. We’re running creative agencies, product lines, communities, and digital platforms from our laptops and living rooms. We’re the face of the brand and the strategy behind it. And we’re doing it with empathy, intuition, and killer instincts.

    Here’s what I know:
    If you’re passionate about something, go for it.
    You don’t need permission.
    You don’t need to have it all figured out.
    You will make mistakes, fail, and that’s the point.
    Just start.

    Because the moment you do?
    You realize who you really are.

    And spoiler alert:
    She’s a badass.

  • “I need a break from my phone” – me, five hours after scrolling non-stop

    “I need a break from my phone” – me, five hours after scrolling non-stop

    Lately, I’ve caught myself doing that thing where you open Instagram, close it… then open it again three seconds later. It’s not even conscious at this point, it’s autopilot. Like muscle memory, but with slightly more existential dread.

    The truth is: I love my screen (but at the same time I don’t). It keeps me connected, entertained, inspired, and occasionally gives me the serotonin hit I didn’t know I needed (hi, funny Tana Mongeau videos). But I’ve also noticed the flip side. The overstimulation. The headaches. The constant comparison trap. And that weird foggy feeling that creeps in when I’ve been staring at a screen for too long.

    So, I took a break.

    I’ve been off Instagram for almost a month now, and honestly? I feel way more present. Like I can hear myself think again. Like I’m actually in my life, not just watching it unfold through stories or comparing it to someone else’s highlight reel.

    So, how can we be a little more mindful with our screen time?

    Here are a few things that have actually helped me stop spiraling into the digital void:

    1. Create screen ‘windows’

    Instead of being on all the time, I’ve started scheduling windows for checking social apps, so once in the morning (after journaling, if I’m feeling like that girl), once around lunch, and then again in the evening. Giving myself clear times makes it feel like a choice, not a compulsion.

    2. Set time limits (and stick to them)

    I used to think app timers were unnecessary…until I realized I was spending four hours a day on YouTube. Now, I set a 30-minute limit on my most-used apps. Sure, I sometimes hit “Ignore for 15 more minutes,” but hey, progress, not perfection.

    3. Power down before bed

    This one changed my sleep game. Shutting down electronics two hours before bedtime has helped my brain actually wind down. When I can’t resist some sort of media, I’ll switch to music, a podcast, or an audiobook, something that doesn’t require my eyes to be glued to a screen. It’s way gentler on the brain and honestly, my dreams are better too.

    So what’s the deal with screens + mental health?

    Too much screen time, especially without breaks, can impact our brains. Constant stimulation trains our brains to seek dopamine hits fast (scroll, like, scroll again), which makes it harder to focus, feel grounded, or even enjoy the little things IRL.

    Studies have also shown that excessive screen use can mess with our sleep cycles, increase anxiety, and mess with our attention span. And if you’re already feeling emotionally off? The constant stream of curated content can feel more like a punch in the gut than an escape.

    It’s not about quitting your phone, it’s about checking in with how you’re using it

    I still love my phone. I still make aesthetic Pinterest boards, scroll on YouTube shorts, and send memes occasionally at midnight. But I also give myself permission to disconnect. To sit in silence. To be a little bored.

    Because sometimes the real magic happens off screen, when you’re sitting at the beach, taking a walk, or just breathing for a second without a notification pulling you back in.

    So if you needed a sign to log off and go touch some grass? This is it.